SEXUAL DELUSIONS: BELIEVING IN FALSEHOODS IS HARMLESS?

A red pill and a blue pill (from here)

Any thoughtful person, anyone willing to carefully examine their motives and assumptions, will eventually realize the power of make-believe is startling. We can get so involved in our fantasies we really do start living them. Consider.

  • A child with an imaginary friend.
  • The sports fans who talk as if they think they are on the team.
  • The elderly ladies who talk about their soap operas as if the people in them were real.
  • The conspiracy theorist who believes in wild conspiracies.
  • That nice person who would never hurt anyone’s feelings by telling them the truth.
  • The people who voted for Benito Mussolini and Adolf Hitler and turned their eyes away when the Nazis exterminated millions.

Are we very much different? Consider all the oxy-morons we use these days.

  • Same-sex marriage: If the sex of the two people in a marriage is not important, then why do we need to describe a “marriage” as “same-sex”?
  • Transgender woman: If the birth sex of a person is not important, then why do would we describe a woman as transgender? How many males would seriously consider marrying a transgender woman?
  • Gay: Just how many homosexual men are truly happy about the fact they find themselves attracted to other men.
  • Casual Sex or Recreational Sex: When we have sex with another person, we risk the conception of a baby, forming a deep-seated emotional bond, and sharing nasty germs and viruses. Yet some people are silly enough to think a sexual relationship can be casual or just for fun.
  • Amicable Divorce: See the last oxy-moron, casual sex.
  • Safe Sex: This is an expression used by people who are ignorant enough to think that there are reliable technical fixes for the problems that inevitably arise from fornication.
  • Consensual Rape: Some people use this expression to describe what they apparently think is a form of lovemaking.
  • Free Love:  If we have not given something vitally important to us — at least a profound emotional commitment — to the person we say we are in love with, then why would we think we are in love?
  • Open Marriage: Some people think this is a serious idea, but doesn’t an “open” marriage defeat the whole point of marrying?
  • Wicked Good or Wickedly Good: This is the belief that sin can be pleasurable. Apparently, this belief arises in us when we refuse to consider the consequences. Would it be accurate to say this expression is frequently associated with the prospect of “wickedly good” sex?
  • Unwanted Baby: An oxy-moronic expression? Think about it. Why would “unwanted baby” be an oxy-moron?

How did we get to the point we are using such absurd oxy-moronic expressions? Well, here is an article that seems on point.

What our sex-saturated culture has wrought by Rita Dunaway

There’s no question that sexual assault is an epidemic in the U.S. There’s no question that we are right to be outraged by the brutish behavior of Hollywood bigshots like Harvey Weinstein and that such behavior should result in serious consequences of both the social and legal variety. The real question is: When will we open our collective eyes and recognize that widespread sexual misbehavior is an inevitable byproduct of a sex-saturated culture?

Our opposition to indecent behavior seems to be a mile wide and an inch deep. While we are remarkably unified in our disdain for sexual harassment and assault, that galvanized opposition doesn’t extend to the epidemic’s underlying causes. We’re complacent toward the cultural trends that constantly push sex and sexuality upon our conscious and subconscious thoughts, the efforts to deaden our sensibilities and erase the boundaries that once defined a concept of decency. (continued here)

Is the choice between taking a red or a blue pill? Is the choice simply a matter of discipline, a refusal to accept anything less than the truth? Or do we have to turn to God, put our faith in Him and strive to become wise as our Creator is wise?

Whatever we think the choice might be, we need to start thinking of our children. Are we making the choice we make for the sake of our children or out of pure selfishness?

46 thoughts on “SEXUAL DELUSIONS: BELIEVING IN FALSEHOODS IS HARMLESS?

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  1. That’s one of the reasons I was so disgusted with the Harvey Weinstein debacle. Not only with his outrageous behavior, but having to watch an industry that basically built itself on exploitation and sexual violence fall all over themselves denouncing him.

    We are a very sexually obsessed culture for sure, but I’m not sure sexual assault incidents are actually on the rise. The “1 in 4” rape stat you frequently here about college campuses is a complete fabrication built on flimsy studies with questions asked of women that have nothing to do with rape but where a yes answer gets counted as one. Not saying there aren’t problems with sexual assault, but that our victimhood culture and perpetually offended way of life make it difficult to discern the truth.

    Anyway, much delusion in the world today, thanks for a good overview.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Thank you, and thanks for your cogent observations.

      Statistics are often used to perpetuate lies.

      Definition of Statistics: The science of producing unreliable facts from reliable figures.
      Evan Esar

      There are three kinds of lies: lies, damned lies, and statistics.
      Benjamin Disraeli

      Statistics show that of those who contract the habit of eating, very few survive.
      George Bernard Shaw

      An unsophisticated forecaster uses statistics as a drunken man uses lamp-posts – for support rather than for illumination.
      Andrew Lang

      Liked by 2 people

      1. I dare suggest that it’s less about the statistics themselves but way more about their interpretation… and factual stats can be made to support either side of an issue. As with trying to understand the media.. it takes a level of critical thinking and common sense to establish a “reasonableness” in what you are seeing being represented.
        I rather favor Andrew Lang’s quote best of all.

        Liked by 1 person

  2. I respect Tom and others who find comfort to bring their religious feeling into social issues and as Tom knows from me I will try not to debate beliefs themselves, and I wasn’t even going to respond to his post. But I can disagree on what I perceive as incorrect assumptions of human behavior. As I was getting ready to click onto that link Tom provided I got wary on the title and then I read the first sentence in the quote provided…..
    Let me address the title first… as Tricia seemed to echo the essence of it.

    “What our sex-saturated culture has wrought”

    Um… we do not have a sex-saturated culture any more than any other country. By comparison to the last 300 years of religious inspiration in North America, brought over by the Puritans and other derivatives and passed on, yep.. compared to them one might think we were sex-saturated. Actually, until the 60’s woke a few people up our culture was sexually repressed. I am reminded of the late actress Marlene Dietrich in her quote made back in 1962…

    “Sex: In America it’s an obsession, in the rest of the world it’s fact.” No… back in 1962 her idea of America’s sex “obsession” was the fact that we historically have tried to contain it even exists… burying it in the smoke of religion and pure social “prim & proper” behavior to the point that it became part of our culture to avoid any suggestion that it occurred outside the bedroom down to the making sure young people weren’t told too much for fear of turning them into sexual psychos. Our obsession was in keeping quiet about it.

    Here’s the other line that made me wince.
    “There’s no question that sexual assault is an epidemic in the U.S. ”

    It is?? Compared to what? I will fully understand if someone wishes to believe the entire world has too much sexual assault.. epidemic, whatever, ok… fine. But.. there is NO sexual assault epidemic in America. I refuse to acknowledge that somehow America has gone from being repressive to being rapists and abusers to the extent that there’s an “epidemic”. There are wars and conflicts going on in the world that use rape and assault to intimidate and oppress.. and in pure genocide. There are cultures in the world that allow and even encourage assault toward women. No.. what is happening, what has been “discovered” by revealing Weinstein and all the other jerks, has been going on since the beginning of humankind. Sorry.. this is not just America.

    But… that does not one bit suggest we cannot try and change the behavior in our own neighborhood and that is what we should draw from all the current outrage. We should quit trying to assign some extraneous blame.. like blaming “America”. This crap goes well into our essence of being human. Once we realize and accept that then we can begin to target on the important things to raise cultural awareness, tweak the laws, communicate, whatever will work. I know it’s tempting for women to want to blame every human that has a penis.. because if us “penis-bearers” are not directly abusing women we are obviously “enabling” another male to do so. Perhaps the question to ask for the answer women likely don’t want to hear, “Why does a man get an erection?”

    Like

    1. @Doug

      Is there a t sexual assault is an epidemic in the U.S.? That was not the part of Rita Danaway’s article that got my attention. Dunaway’s focus is on the sex-saturation of our culture. As Tricia observed and my reply indicated, we don’t know. These days we have trouble even defining sexual assault.

      In her article, Dunaway endeavor’s to demonstrate that we have a sex-saturated culture. Since I don’t see much point in repeating what is a short article, I suggest my readers consider your observations in the context of what she wrote.

      Here is what I find curious about your attempt to refute Dunaway.

      Um… we do not have a sex-saturated culture any more than any other country. By comparison to the last 300 years of religious inspiration in North America, brought over by the Puritans and other derivatives and passed on, yep.. compared to them one might think we were sex-saturated. Actually, until the 60’s woke a few people up our culture was sexually repressed. I am reminded of the late actress Marlene Dietrich in her quote made back in 1962…

      It seems you agree that something has changed. If America can change, can it experience greater and lesser degrees of change than elsewhere. Can it be better or worse. Is there room for improvement? Should we repress a discussion of what those improvements might involve?

      Instead of focusing on what Dunaway says in her article, you focused on who she seemed to be blaming. Yet blaming someone has almost nothing to do with Dunaway’s article, and she did not hold up the old Puritanical values of New England as something we should restore. Dunaway talked about today, what we are doing wrong today and the harm that is causing.

      Please set aside your preconceptions. Stop debating phantoms and stereotypes of your own imagination. That is the root of prejudice. Instead of what you expected her to say, what did Dunaway actually say?

      Liked by 1 person

      1. I most surely did focus on the title of her post.. the sentence you quoted from it, and the response from Tricia (who I tend to enjoy her remarks, btw) who seemed to echo the “America as sex epidemic country”. If Dunaway’s remarks were completely opposite then it seems to be an issue of the author failing to identify her topic properly.
        That nonsense out of the way….

        “Please set aside your preconceptions. Stop debating phantoms and stereotypes of your own imagination. That is the root of prejudice. Instead of what you expected her to say, what did Dunaway actually say?”

        Oh please, Tom… my remarks, irregardless of your interpretation of what Dunaway wrote, stand on their own as part and parcel to the existing argument many women have regarding the abuse and assault issue. Personally I think you allow your personal beliefs to get in the way of solving real world problems. You seem to prefer wading through the morality to find blame rather than dealing in objectivity and using morality to guide a social solution.

        Like

        1. It’s not sex that I and I think Tom are referencing but the sexualization of our culture where it’s prominence is elevated beyond most things and perversions become the norm which popular books like 50 Shades of Grey and beauty contests for young girls the fact exemplify perfectly.

          Liked by 1 person

        2. Tricia.. then, from what you are suggesting, someone or some entity has to decide what might be perversion and what is not, what books illustrate this perversion and should be condemned, or that beauty contests, for young or old, are simply extensions of our sexual desire, rather than acknowledging female beauty in all forms (it’s not all about the bathing suits).

          (I will say.. if you are suggesting “young” as being young-young.. like the crazy crap Jon-Bonet Ramsey was put through.. and that goofy “Here Comes Honey Boo-Boo”.. unless they are being respected for their age and juvenile-level accomplishments and NOT in a pretentious adult-like personification.)

          Like

  3. Lots of reasons things are the way they are right now.
    The short answer is, too many people value the wrong things.
    Result isn’t good.
    If I were to write a book on the topic, I’d make an entire chapter dedicated to the bastardization of language and how this weaves into the way people think. Some words have been created to make the normal sound abnormal (examples: cis-gendered, demo-sexual). Others have been misused to convey a weird unearned status to the mundane. There was a time when “surviver” meant an actual surviver, heroic actual heroism, pride a feeling of person achievement from an actual accomplishment, victim and actual victim, and so forth.

    Case in point, I was in a Starbucks yesterday and there was a sign on the table with the photo of a woman. It said: “Mother of six forges past fear and skepticism to create LGBTQ community center”
    I have to wonder (though not enough to look into it) what exactly the fear was?
    Also what the point of having a lesbian-gay-bisexual-transexual-questioning community center is?
    Also if she’s the mother of six, wouldn’t her efforts have been put to better use elsewhere?
    …and many other questions.
    But, it’s clear the intent is to convey this is a brave, brave person…for, um, some reason.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I would agree… assigning seemingly flippant quasi-intellectual terms that appear to be basement political correctness does get old and tends to make everything so much more complex. We linger on the terms rather than understanding the emotions behind it all.
      I was thinking of organizing the much avoided and often condemned group of Americans who pick their noses at 10:45 am every Wednesday. How sad and unfortunate that these good Christian nose pickers have been shunned whenever they chose to exercise their right in public to pick their nose… at 10:45am… on Wednesdays. In fact there’s a name… the National Rhinotillexis-On-Schedule Society.. not to be confused with that other bunch, Americans For Mucophagy.

      Liked by 1 person

  4. “It is?? Compared to what? I will fully understand if someone wishes to believe the entire world has too much sexual assault.. epidemic, whatever, ok… fine. But.. there is NO sexual assault epidemic in America.”

    I don’t agree with you on the “America=puritanical, sexually repressed” bit, but I definitely agree with the above. But epidemic isn’t even the worst term that gets thrown around. The worst is “culture”. A term intended to convey we live in a culture where sexual assault is condoned and enabled. It’s pretty insulting to all of us. But, if you don’t have victims you can’t really push an agenda. You realize this is all a liberal-based agenda, right?

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I realize that everything has to have some level of politics assigned to it… but it seems to me politics enters the picture when one side or the other suggests a fix, solution, or remedy to what the problem is. Regarding female abuse and assault I don’t see us yet at that point of solving anything. Heck, no one can even agree on where to even start understanding the problem. On one end you have women who favor something akin to solving the problem the Lorena Bobbit way… and others (many smart ladies reflected in here and on Insanity’s blog) actually want to give this some objective thought.

      Liked by 1 person

  5. Ok, I don’t know if this has anything to do with that red pill business I keep reading on IB’s site, of which I still don’t know what it is as I’ve never seen it before until reading her blog—maybe that’s how social media sheltered I am…and perhaps that is really a good thing—

    any way—

    I’ve told Tricia when this all first started that it is now almost comical (not that rape or abuse has any levity whatsoever) but the sheer numbers of the elite and not so elite in Hollywood that are now falling like dominos…one allegation begetting another—from heterosexual assaults to now homosexual assaults—as in the madness is now never-ending—their bubble has burst.

    This is something that has been going on since the turn of the century…. on a more famous stage but long before on a lesser stage..big producers, directors etc promising the up and coming dreamers wonderful things if only they would…..

    And it is no secret to anyone as it has been something so prevalent that is has been common place—and for everyone to suddenly act aghast is what is so comical—-they’ve known this, participated in it and “allowed” it to perpetuate and now they don’t know how to stop the flood…

    I find it ironic that Europeans have always said that we in the US have a hang up with sex—which harkens back to a more puritanical culture—that if we would just “free” ourselves and not see it as such a big deal—yet they too are plagued with the same sexual crimes and “sickness” that we are plague by…

    Man has taken what was a God given gift of intimacy and an act of procreating to the debased level of sinfulness…

    as the dominos continue to fall

    Liked by 1 person

    1. “This is something that has been going on since the turn of the century…. on a more famous stage but long before on a lesser stage..big producers, directors etc promising the up and coming dreamers wonderful things if only they would…..”

      And back then they would call anyone who fell for that line an idiot (or “successful” I suppose, depending on the outcome).
      Now they call them victims.

      Liked by 2 people

    2. The red pill business on on IB’s site is a related, but different subject. I am merely making use of a contemporary metaphor (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Red_pill_and_blue_pill). Even though I have never sat down to watch the whole thing, almost everyone else has.

      The United States never actually had a puritanical culture. That is more an invention of Hollywood and some in literary community than anything else. Thus, the 60’s Sexual Revolution was mostly a rebellion against a myth.

      Consider. The Puritans were in New England, not the rest of the country. Although much of the culture defused throughout the country, the rest of the country did not become Puritans. Moreover, whatever it means to become puritanical, it never seems to stop the folks New England from having sex and lots of children.

      What the United States once had was a culture that generally eschewed vulgarity and pornography. Most people did not appreciate the insertion of unrelated sexual references into every conversation or advertisement.

      What the United States once had was a culture that protected and respected women and elevated the importance of motherhood. Unfortunately, so-called feminists insisted women should be treated like men, instead of as the equals of men. Oddly enough, feminists don’t seem to understand the fact that men and women can still be equals even if we are not the same.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. truly so Tom—and no we were not some sort of coast to coast puritanical society–although many would claim that the South, that proverbial Bible Beltway, is still stuck in that time warp—maybe it’s just the last bastion of hope….
        I had a friend who was a stewardess and on one flight coming back into Atlanta when the pilot announced the flight’s arrival into the city, one loud mouthed passenger made a very loud and vocla remark that since they had arrived in Atlanta everyone had best get out their bibles and be ready since they were now back in the bible belt—funny that… since Atlanta prides itself on its huge gay population and “diversity” a Bible city is far from my thinking when I consider Atlanta….

        Liked by 1 person

        1. “The people who most castigate bigotry and judging others don’t seem to see the irony when they exempt themselves from themselves from practicing what they preach.”

          “Get off your soap box!” – they yell down to others from their soap box perch.

          There’s so much comedy in life. (especially satire these days)

          Liked by 2 people

        1. @Doug

          Fake news? I bet you have been itching to find an excuse to say that, but this is a blog, not CNN or FoxNews. People don’t come here for their news. They come here to discuss politics and religion.

          Did the USA ever have a puritanical culture? I don’t think so. You made an assertion based upon “conventional wisdom”. I just observed that I don’t see enough evidence to support this so-called wisdom.

          Ever heard of the bundling board?
          http://www.encyclopedia.com/social-sciences-and-law/anthropology-and-archaeology/customs-and-artifacts/bundling

          I doubt the wisdom of the practice, but I give the people who came up with the bundling board credit for trying to figure out the best way to deal with some very difficult issues. Even with a board between them, putting a young man and woman in the same bed overnight and expecting self restraint is asking a bit much.

          As I have said before, people living on farms did not need sex education. Their concern was strong families. They understood better than we that strong families facilitate both salvation and survival. Without farm animals to demonstrate where babies come from, sex education may be a good idea today, but politicians are last people we should put in charge of teaching our children.

          Like

    3. Julie.. you make one of my points very well. “Everyone” is aghast and outraged when this abuse toward women has been since the beginning of time…. but not always entirely represented in every culture that has come and gone in world history, which suggests that maybe our culture can find a solution which embodies greater respect between the genders. We can’t change the world, or even human nature, but we can strive to change our society and try and pass that on to the next generation.

      Liked by 2 people

        1. While I would agree very much methinks before we get there, there’s a tough road to travel in understanding who we are as human beings first. I dare say just sitting around in a circle and talking about what ticks each of us off and expecting to leave in a kumbaya hug isn’t gonna work… although I wish it did.

          Liked by 2 people

    1. well Tricia and Tom are leading the way, I just do a bit of tidying up along the outskirts—-
      The bottom line with this sex business—and we can indeed truthfully say it is now very much a business, is that we humans have blatantly turned from God—His gift to us as man and wife…yes, I said it, man and wife—as in how all of this was intended to be in the first place…..for we have twisted, contorted and turned it into a self indulgent focus—a debased hedonistic self gratification sensual fest—-whatever flavor our twisted oddness desires…
      no longer do we consider partner and mutual involvement—it becomes a me first physical satisfaction indulgence that we take for granted…as long as we can get away with it and get what WE want out of it…to heck with anyone else involved because this is about me and what I want and I just want to feel good or fulfill some twisted fantasy…..
      And dare I say many a drunken or high individual who imbibed in too much physical play during ones altered state, who finally returns to a “normal” sober sense, if they remembered what they had done just hours prior, suddenly feel violated and cry foul—
      Lesson: do not set yourself up by being drunk or high or whatever when knowing good and well sex is a risk….
      or better yet, honor your self, the body God gave you—the gift that you will in turn give….to a beloved spouse….
      But no body seems to get the whole “gift” notion or the notion of man and woman as in husband and wife…..so why am I even bothering wasting Tom’s air space….sigh….

      Liked by 2 people

      1. @Julie (aka Cookie)

        I very much appreciate the comment, and I expect others do too.

        The people making the most noise these days are the folks who oppose traditional marriage. That does not put them in the majority. Many people have suffered from the chaos in their lives that results from fornication. Many still don’t have both the wisdom to connect the sin of fornication with their suffering and the suffering they have caused. Others do not know where to obtain the spiritual strength firmly reject the behaviors that lead to both their own suffering and the suffering they caused. So we need to keep talking about these problems just as you just did.

        Liked by 1 person

  6. Great post Tom.

    Sex makes lots and lots of money for people who market sex for profit. It is a basic pleasure of the flesh for all living creations. However, humans, unlike most animal species who mate in seasons to produce offspring. are conditioned by marketers to enhance romantic or unnatural fantasy in order to focus their potential customers on the pleasure part and neglect the responsibility, and health risk parts.

    The result in just the USA is a million abortions every year, and millions infected with a STD, some like HIV/AIDS deadly and costly.

    Millions more single parent households and associated problems.

    What is the answer to solve all the problems of marketing romantic fantasy and pleasure of sex? The answer were known and told thousands of years ago in the advice given to young women to wise them up with facts instead of fantasies.

    “Fornication brings on lactation.”

    4 I charge you, O daughters of Jerusalem, that ye stir not up, nor awake my love, until he please. (Marries You)

    Regards and goodwill blogging.

    Liked by 1 person

  7. U said

    True, but convincing people of that is difficult. Wisdom is not easily learned and accepted.

    I say

    Might be the most profound understatement ever made, in my opinion.

    Sad when you compare the time it takes to fix or live with the problems in life that could have been avoided by spending time to learn and accept wisdom,.

    Regards and goodwill blogging..

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Sad when you compare the time it takes to fix or live with the problems in life that could have been avoided by spending time to learn and accept wisdom.

      Many of us learn wisdom from the time it takes to fix or by living with the problems in life that could have been avoided by spending time to learn and accept wisdom.
      🙂

      Experience is a hard-nosed instructor.

      Liked by 1 person

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